Where to begin..

Well here we are. In the middle of year 2020. Corona virus is ramping back up for round two. I picture Covid as a bull who ran at a Matador’s red muleta, only to be fooled by the flip of his wrist. Covid is mad, pawing her hoof in the dirt and charging full on for a second round. This has been the best yet most frustrating year of my life.

Let’s be real..

I’ve spent months trying to decided what my first blog post should focus on. Honestly, I will probably never be satisfied with what I post thanks to the perfectionist part of me. Lol! That’s okay. I have to start somewhere right?

Let’s start the with best…

March 1st, K (this is what we will call my fiance for now.) proposed me to! Literally the BEST. DAY. EVER. I flew back to the Great State of Texas and began the process of planning our wedding. I found the perfect dress, planned the perfect elopement (we will have a second wedding in our home town after his first deployment), booked a photographer and the cheapest flights. Our date was set for April 2nd and we were beyond excited.

Fast forward to the worst…

I have now postpond our elopement three times. We currently do not have a date set because his squadron has been put on lock down, and the base has very strict restrictions in place. It sucks. Yes there could be worse things. Yes I am counting my blessings. However, it just sucks.

So, what have I learned from this? Well, I would say there are three important lessons I have taken away. First of all, patience is a virtue. I’ve heard that my entire life but let me tell you, I see the truth in that comment more every single day. I keep thinking, “ten years from now we will look back and laugh”.

Secondly, enjoy today! I’m not saying to not look forward to the future, but the future isn’t guaranteed. With or without the Navy, plans will change. Getting my hopes up to only have them crushed is defeating. I’ve learned to be excited for my future, but to enjoy today because this is now. I need to enjoy now. I try to find the positive in everything. That’s the only way I can get through this time in my life. Today I cancelled all of the plans for our third try at getting married. It’s hard to find joy in these moments.

Lastly, I have to find joy because I have to be his constant. My fiance is stuck in Florida for school for the next week. He is working 6 days a week and is quarantined. He is stressed, he is frustrated, and he can’t even go for a run. After all of that the one thing he was looking forward to was seeing me after 4 months of being apart, and finally getting married. I want him to be able to rely on my consistency to him. I will always love, support, encourage, and find joy with him. That doesn’t mean I’m not allowed to have a bad day. We are human, it’s inevitable. But this is the life we chose. I’m not going to spend all of my days crying and moping. “Rejoice in our sufferings.” These plans are not what we had in mind, but that’s okay. So today I am thankful for my family, my job, my friends, my dogs, my health, and I’m thankful that I get to plan a fourth elopement with my fiance. Ten years from now we will look back and laugh. So why not be joyful and laugh now?

– Ash

If you have read this far, leave a comment and let me know about your Covid experience. What have you learned?

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